I am going to post some stuff soon. I been busy!!!!!!!!!!!!
The news has been making me really anxious lately so I have decided to take an extended break from reading the news on the net; this also includes gossip sites. Reading about murders, rapes, and politics 10x a day was starting to depress me (even more). I spend so much time on the internet even after quitting Facebook and Twitter I am still glued to my fucking computer. The sad part is that I am not even doing anything besides stressing myself out. This little paragraph has taken three hours to write because of me flittering between Pinterest and YouTube. Sigh
Oh my god I am so depressed! I am excited because at least I know I am depressed; awareness is half the battle. I am always fighting my depression sometimes I get ahead but never really quite win the war. Anyway I am hoping I can come out of it in a few days.
I wish I could forget your number it’s not that I have the urge to call you but if your number would permanently erase from my brain things would feel final. Our friendship did not die with a big argument but when you stopped calling me I stopped calling you. You stood me up one too many times and even said in your own words “I am just focused on other things”. To myself I was like ‘why even make plans then’? Our friendship was great when it was great and I really appreciate all the time we spent together laughing. I was bitter when our friendship ended but now I am ok. People change and grow and eventually move on; but I really want to forget your number. I bet you don’t remember mine I was always a lot more sentimental than you. Anyway I hope you are well and happy, I am the same for the most part and I am making new friends and reconnecting with old ones.
I usually carry my camera but this past week I forgot so I have been taking pics with my shitty Boost Mobile phone. The picture quality sucks but it’s more discreet and convenient than a traditional camera. So here is my past week in 1.3 Mega-Pixels, the good, the bad, and the annoying.
Damn this is so mean but every time I see this ad for weight loss surgery I think “damn you looked better fat”! Fuck I know I am fat and shit but I am not going to be getting my stomach and shit cut out so I can look like a sick version of myself.
Nurse mad about something. I came across this protest on the way to work and I actually interviewed a lady about what the problem is; but as usual I am too lazy to do in depth piece. But to summarize, nurses are pissed they losing benefits and they are not having it.
So annoying that products marketed to Black people have names like ‘Hip Hop’ that is so 80′s. What in the fuck does ‘Hip Hop’ have to do with hair combs?
Look at me doing adult activities with other people! I went to the Academy of Science is San Francisco with my friend; they actually have a rain forest habitat with beautiful butterflies.
I think I am going to make a zine. I was at work and saw one that a girl made and I was kind of impressed; you can write about any bullshit and self publish. So I am thinking of doing maybe ten pages of short stories, poems, and essays. I have a strong track record of not following through but this seems like a good idea and I will keep myself posted as no one reads this blog. HA HA.
I am not a Christmas person really so I don’t have much to say. I will updating my blog more this upcoming week. I have been working a lot so I have not had the time to post ‘quality’ posts. Thank you to the 5 people that regualary check out my blog.
I took a vow of celibacy recently but sometimes on days like this I wish I had a partner. Not just because I miss the sex but when you are stressed it is good to talk to someone that really cares.
I did my first full day of work and I feel like so…institutionalized. I am right back in the groove of things just like I have not been working for the last six months. Ok, I am lay down before I pass out; the rest of my day will be furtive masturbation and anxious thoughts.
It’s ok to forgive yourself but not mandatory you forgive others, it would be nice but it’s up to you. Continue Reading