I have no idea how I got started watching bodybuilding films on Youtube but this Kai Greene is something else. I fell in love with him for about 12 minutes because he is cute, soft spoken, and has an amazing work ethic it seems. I fell out of love with him because he can break my neck off if I am late coming home from work or burn the pot roast and that is just too much pressure for me. Enjoy the videos:
Dr. Scott is not a MD (that I know of) but he is a Bay Area rapper that reps for the BIG GIRLS. I feel so down about my weight sometimes but his music reminds me that there is someone out there that likes it. My goal for 2012 is to start having sex with a decent dude and not the usual scumbags that I attract.
I look at this video not for the reason the other million on YouTube have (pretty girl in panties); I imagine how cool it would be if a person as fat as me could do this type of yoga. I bet having a reasonable body weight makes it possible to balance yourself just using your upper body; seeing as I am closer to 300lbs than 200lbs I would probably need to have some massive biceps.
Yoga is my favorite exercise because it’s not so hard on the knees. I really want to try balancing but fuck I don’t want to end up a paraplegic or something.
I gave in to my carnal urges and went on a ‘date’ with the Random Dude (RD) that had been texting me all week. I was really conflicted about whether I should let myself be a part of a ‘pump and dump’ which is where a dude is looking for sex and once you give it up you will never hear from them again. My main concern about sex is diseases the next thing is basically the guilt and shame I tend to have with sex.
I talked to RD about safe sex and he said the only brand he can use is Magnum Ecstasy and he put it upon me to buy them. I was instantly peeved that I had to put out money but he was supposed to bring weed so I felt it evened out; plus the price of condoms is small in compared to what they do.
He was supposed to come over around 7 and I was waiting anxiously I had showered and I was afraid of getting stinky again waiting for him. He did not make to my apartment until 9PM and I was incredibly annoyed; did I mention that this RD was also high out of his mind?! Fortunately it did not seem to be anything other than weed and booze but I was irritated and my mind starting wandering and telling me that this dude had to be high to get it on with me. When we got to my apartment he pulled out the blunt and it was half smoked, he pulled out the booze and it was half drunk. Really; these cheap ass antics was really not making me feel in the mood to bang. But as I smoked the half blunt and three shots left in the bottle I got more relaxed. I was able to remember why I had agreed to fuck him in the first place; he the type of dude that oozes sex.
I won’t gross you all out with the gory details but I really had sex with this dude; nasty adult type sex. I did ok seeing as it has been a long time since I have done anything. I had sex once in 2010 and probably nothing for year before that so I was rusty. I am really self conscious about my skills but me not liking this dude in a romantic way made me a little more confident because I did not have anything to lose if I was awful. I will say that 15-20 minutes of actual penetration is all that I have in me stamina wise and this dude went on for an hour; I actually got bored. After the deed RD was like “Wow I really gotta go I got to get up for work at 440AM”, I was just laughing partly because of the weed but mostly because the whole after sex scene is so predictable. I think he had a genuine fear that I was going to ask him to stay the night but obviously I am not like other women; I really don’t want to have to look at you in the morning either, so kick rocks! I am not cold I just know men don’t like to stay and I stopped wanting that; after he left I just kicked back and finished my wine coolers, sanitized my apartment, and watched videos on youtube.
I have to mention is that I would totally have sex with him again if the opportunity arose; I feel like if I had more practice that sex could be even better for me. This dude could never be relationship material though; remember I mentioned the box of condoms I bought? Something told me before he came not to put them all out because they might walk away. So I put out four we used two but he took the other two with him. That is so trifling in my opinion; those shits are expensive and basically he took condoms I bought to fuck another chick; I am all for safe sex but that is just some classless broke nigga shit. Maybe I WONT have sex with him again.
Akon kind of reminds me of my ‘baby-daddy’ but that is not the reason I think he is hot. I have a thing for dark dudes (sometimes); they are so beautiful to me. But unfortunately every dark skinned dude I have dealt with has been a piece of shit. So I have this forbidden fruit syndrome, I want what I cannot have and what’s not good for me.
I might find a decent chocolate drop of my own one day but in the meantime I still have Akon.